Long distance relationships (LDR) occur for many reasons and have various benefits and drawbacks.
You may be in a LDR because:
- You met on line and live far away.
- One or both of you are in the military.
- One our both of you attend school in separate areas.
- You live in separate cities and are not ready to commit to relocating.
- A job’s location keeps you in different states/providences or countries.
Anyone who’s ever been in a long distance relationship is aware that loving from afar can be extremely difficult. On the other hand, LDR’s can also have numerous plusses. In order to ensure your relationship succeeds you have to make the most of the good stuff and learn to deal with the bad as best you can.
- Absence really does make the heart grow founder. Being apart causes one to appreciate what they have.
- Reunions. You spend weeks or months planning and waiting for the day to arrive and when it does - ah, those magical moments. You covet every second of that precious time together, making the most of each day.
- The passion! A fire left smoldering over time, takes just a nudge to erupt into a raging, untamable fire.
- Space. For those who like their alone time, a long distance relationship can give you the freedom you need along with the benefit of knowing you have someone special in your life.
- Longing, loneliness and the torturous missing of your other half can play havoc with your heart and emotions.
- While the cats away? For some, suspicion and jealousy can drive a wedge in any relationship.
- Flying solo at parties and events because your love is too far away to attend can be difficult, lonely and make for many early nights.
There are certain tools you can incorporate into a long distance relationship to make for a smoother more romantic love from afar. These include:
- National/international text
Most prepaid and contract plans offer texting as part of their monthly fees.
Texts are a great way to keep in touch throughout the day for pennies a message.
Phone calls, texts, letters and emails are great ways to keep in touch but there’s nothing like laying your eyes on your honey and hearing their voice in real time. And Skype is absolutely free! All you need is a computer and a webcam. Gaze into your love’s eyes and avoid outrageous phone bills to boot?! Can’t beat that! Not to mention all the urrr, unmentionables, you can do on Skype.
To download Skype go to: www.skype .com
If you travel frequently to visit your sweetheart, you should take advantage of incentive programs like frequent flyer miles, travel points and hotel programs.
Priority customer services like free upgrades, early check-in and extra night stays make travel more comfortable, enjoyable and cheaper!
Keep The Romance Alive:
When physically together, words are not always necessary to show your affection. A loving gaze, a quick caress or simply holding your honey’s hand can portray how you’re feelings without a single word passing between you. When far away from the one you love, these quiet exchanges aren’t possible but fear not! There’s plenty of ways to express your love and let your sweetheart know you’re thinking of them. Here’s some fun suggestions that will keep your love feigning:
- Write a love letter - Come up with your own sweet words, buy colored or decorated stationary or download some at http://entertainment.webshots.com/album/554289648LVaCcx Spray the letter and envelope with your favorite cologne or perfume. Give your love note that extra special touch by adding something personal in the envelope like a picture of yourself taken especially for your love or even a lock of your hair.
- Write a sonnet - Whether you’re a Grade A poet or can barely string three words together, your sweetheart will revel in a poem or song written for them. Romantic, funny or just plain silly, if it’s written from the heart, you’ll have her swooning or him pretending there’s something in his eye. If putting words together to form a message of love is not your forte, try a website that composes love poems for you with your sweethearts name included such as: http://www.festisite.com/love/poems/
- Order lunch and have it delivered - Google map their office, find the closest main street and search for a deli or restaurant nearby. Your love will be happily shocked when their surprise lunch arrives.
- Balloon 'o' grams - A fun way to make a statement of love. Safest to have them sent to their home.
- Send flowers - Does she have a favorite flower? If not roses are always perfect, the flower of romance. Plan what the card will say ahead of time to choose the perfect words that will double the romantic effect.
Alternatively, if you don’t want to send real flowers, you can design a vase full of flowers with a card to be delivered via email at: http://www.flowers2mail.com/
- Send your sweetheart a cup full of love. - Everyone loves a love story. Whether it’s the girl who answers the phone or one of your sweetheart’s colleagues, ask someone at your honey’s job to make a run to the coffee room. Deliver a long distance hug in the form of a cup of Java or tea made just how they like it.
- Send gifts – anything big or small, cheap or expensive, as long as it comes from you, will make their day.
- Name a star after you sweetheart - Although there is no official means for a member of the general public to name an astronomical body, The International Star registry offers a fun means of letting someone know they are the brightest star in your universe. ISR provides packages that enable you to unofficially name a star after someone you love. Variable priced packages come with a certificate of registry or a framed certificate of registry, a personalized sky chart containing the star name, star date, the constellation and the star location circled in red, an astronomy booklet and a wallet sized card imprinted with the star name and coordinates. http://www.iau.org
- Create an online bulletin board to share memories, photos and images, leave messages for each other or plan your next rendezvous or trip. You can sign into a joint board or series of boards and watch as one another post stickies and other stuff in real time. Try these online bulletin boards:
- Dedicate a song - Does your love listen to a specific radio station? Call the station and dedicate a special song at a time when you know they’ll be listening.
- Send a care package - A package or basket full of love arriving on his/her doorstep will warm your honeys heart and keep them smiling all day. Bake their favorite cookies, add a beloved flower, aroma therapy or scent, an endearing picture of you, a delicious packaged food from your area or country and anything else you think they’ll cherish.
- Mail, or hide in their luggage after an encounter, a personal garment like a pair of panties or for a woman or less provocative gift, a worn, comfy shirt that holds your scent for your love to sleep in.
Share time and Have fun together:
You can only talk for so long before you start running out of things to say! Use your imagination and keep your relationship fresh and interesting to avoid falling in to a rut. Add some spice by doing something different every now and then. Here’s a few suggestions to help avoid the LDR blues by keeping it light and having a good time together:
Join Netflix (about $10 a month each). Choose a movie together the day before to be delivered to both of your doors or choose an instant watch movie on Netflix or a free movie site.
Buy some popcorn
- Text each other a mission
Give your love a task to do that will keep them thinking about you all day. For instance, have them take a picture of themselves acting frightened by something they come across like a spider or large dog. Another idea is to request they snap photos of letters from different places spelling out your name or a short message, sending them to you one by one.
If you have an unlimited phone plan, talk on the phone right before bed. When you both get sleepy say goodnight and lay the phone on your pillow. You’d be amazed how sweet the sound of your loves breathing at night can be to a longing heart (unless they’re a chronic snorer of course!)
To do this on Skype: turn out the overhead light and place a small light two or three feet behind the screen, facing towards you. Slip into something sexy (or not), watch each other slip into slumber and dream sweet dreams together.
Mad Libs are a fun word game many of us played as kids. You can find many different free Mad Libs that will keep you laughing and enjoying the night together at: http://www.wordlibs.com
- Join a virtual world together
There are several free virtual communities you can join where you and your love can create your own fantasy world. Build a home together, design and decorate your environment, stroll along the beech, dress up and go to restaurants, museums, night clubs and different cities together. Some sites even offer adult situations for couples. Try a few sites until you find one you both like:
Schedule a date for one night a week. Find a time when you can be alone with no interruptions and spend a dreamy evening together.
- Have a romantic dinner together via Skype
Go online together and choose a recipe you both will like. If possible, bring your laptop or other device into the kitchen and have fun cooking together. Light some candles and set a romantic table. Share a glass of wine or two. Have fun and see where the night leads!
Buy or mix your favorite drinks, get some bar snacks like buffalo wings, pretzels, sliders etc., and pick a name for your bar. Get dressed for a night out. Turn on the music, throw back a few, chat, laugh it up and pretend you’re spending a night on the town. No need for a designated driver, at the end of the night just say goodnight and crawl into bed.
Long distance relationships take lots of love, trust, imagination and hard work to be successful. Whether your separation is short lived or long term, it is likely you will encounter some hard times. Be patient with each other, don’t jump to conclusions and think things through before you speak. Expect road blocks and interruptions. Don’t take everything personal, you live separate lives in separate places, maybe even in separate time zones. Your schedules may be different. Don’t expect your time together on Skype, phone, IM to always go off without a hitch, or void of interjection from the world. Try to find time when you are both alone with no expected intrusions but don’t get angry or upset when life crashes the party from time to time.
With lots of love, if you’re meant to be together, you can make it work!
Author: Jeannie Wraight